Reframing the question

Today I had an interview to be a returning Community Advisor at EMU. One of the questions they asked was "Would you be willing to be a CA in the traditional dorms?" My first reaction to that question- aside from the fact that I have three lovely women who want to live with me- is that my personality and organization style is not best suited for the traditional dorms. In the traditional dorms, there are a lot of details to try to keep track of and planning and advertising, which I'm sometimes not very good at. However, the comment that the housing committee really likes to have returning CA's in the traditional dorms means i am wanted and needed in the dorms.
So my question I asked myself to make a decision then became "Where can I be most useful? in the traditional dorms or in the upperclassmen apartments?" Where would I be able to have the biggest and most needed impact on the other students on our campus? And of course the more obvious answer, especially since I have experience there, is the traditional dorms. But with 18 credit hours next fall and spring, i'm thinking i should rephrase the question: "Where can I grow the most?" Where is it that will allow me to flourish and be alive? While i want to be a servant leader and be there for others, my college career so far has been characterized by feeling like I'm not quite a part of a group here because i have divided loyalties- my international friends, my North American friends, and my hall. So I think what I've decided is that next year needs to be more about me.

“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” -- Howard Thurman

If I'm living with people I feel comfortable with and can be myself around, and if i commit myself to live in community with them, I will have the opportunity to grow and learn and finally be a part of a group. I can then be alive and thus be what the world needs.... And who knows, maybe I'll even feel less scattered.