Papa

Some days I need to write, even though I don’t know what’s going to be expressed when I start. Today is one of those days. The last week and a half has been full of unexpected, and yet not all surprising, events.

Two weeks ago, I got an email from my mother that my grandfather wasn’t eating solid foods anymore. (He has had Parkinson’s disease for about twenty years and it has gotten to the point where he hadn’t been very functional for the last five or ten of those years.) I had plans to go to New York City to visit friends that weekend but I felt that I should go visit my grandparents before I went. So instead of leaving for NYC that Friday, I went from our COBYS Christmas lunch to Mechanicsburg- after some deliberating about whether it was a good idea to drive there in snow. Papa was sleeping the majority of the time I was there, but I did get to talk to him for a few minutes at the beginning and the end of my visit. The time with Nana was precious.

The next day (Saturday) I went to NYC. On Sunday, while exploring NYC with Danny and a friend from high school, I received a message from my supervisor about the death of a client. I have been working with the client’s child. On the way back to the place we were staying, Danny noticed an email from my mom explaining that the on-call nurse had been called in for Papa earlier that day and the nurse advised that nothing be given to him by mouth anymore. And of course that would mean he wouldn’t last more than a week.

I debated coming back from NYC early, but since I had seen Papa the previous Friday, I opted to stay in NYC until Tuesday as I had planned. I had a wonderful and restful day in NYC and then took the train directly from NYC to Harrisburg. I was able to see him again before he passed away.

Papa lived until that Thursday. I’m told it was a peaceful passing and that a lot of the family was there. I was at work at the time, but went straight from work to my grandparents’ house and said a final goodbye before they took the body to the funeral home.  

And then the next day at work, I went to an adoption and a funeral viewing; both for clients. Such a contrast of joy and sorrow.

Needless to say, last week was a roller coaster of emotions. On the one hand, I’m grateful that the battle is over for Papa and that the burden of caring for him and worrying about his wellbeing is lifted from the family- especially Nana. On the other hand, I know he will be missed. The memorial service is this coming weekend… Thinking through all the memories to pick one or two to share at the memorial is a daunting task. At least I have nowhere to be before 4pm today.